The last month or two there have been 2 shows that I admit I watched, and then I feel bad for all girls in the next generation. A generation who is growing up thinking the less clothes the more sexy you are.
The standards of beauty are constantly changing. And girls need to know that they don’t need to fit them. As a tiny example – I was getting my eyebrows threaded, and was saying how I wish I had thicker eyebrows (if you haven’t noticed those are in right now) and she giggled, and said “A few years ago thin eyebrows were in, so it will change back. You have beautiful eyebrows.” As women, can we always tell each other these things?
It is true though. If one day media decides that beauty is defined by being curvy, then I will never fit that standard. And I am learning it is OK. If I am 25 and struggling with how I should look, how scary is that for the 12 year old girls today. But for all the girls who watch other women walk around in lingerie as the standard for beauty they will always be disappointed.
My full time job consists of booking journal entries – not being in a gym to get ready for the world to watch me on a runway. I also love mac and cheese way too much….
One of the shows I unfortunately watched was the Victoria Secret Angel Show. The “Pink” line at Victoria’s Secret is meant for teens. Yet, in the VS Fashion show, girls who are older than that age group are half naked modeling this clothing. What message are you sending Victoria Secret?
Last year someone wrote a blog post that was brilliant. In it they said this:
“If anyone is really worried about the self-esteem of tomorrow’s youth, perhaps we should be teaching them instead that comparison is the thief of joy. Maybe we should tell them that whether they’re built to look like Miranda Kerr or Adele, that they are beautiful and have value as a woman. Instead of teaching our daughters and nieces real women have curves and that ‘those women’ are sickly and abnormal, let’s teach them that it’s never okay to question someone’s identity as a woman because they weigh ten pounds less than the average woman.”
To be honest, I am mainly writing this for myself, because watching Miss Universe and the VS Fashion Show made me analyze things they had, and I didn’t.
I don’t really know what the answer is, because the media will always be there to tell us what the standards of beauty are. But constantly having the conversation that we can, and should break these standards is powerful.
Here’s the thing. Screw standards. No, seriously when can we actually do this? I am so tired of the same topic that “all women come in different shapes and sizes” yet as women we tear each other down, and create an environment where social media dictates how we feel about ourselves when we post a picture of our self.
You are a warrior. You are enough. You don’t need to take your clothes off to be valued. As a fellow woman, you need to hear that.When a women leader is on TV do we really need to evaluate her look or what she is wearing? Can we simply focus on what she brings to the table not what she looks like? Can we not call girls whores, sluts, and crazy? This is not that hard.
I had the privilege of working with Girls on the Run this year. I was able to teach them how strong they were. How gossip and bullying tear other girls down. We were able to share how we need to improve the 5 parts of our “girl wheel” (heart, social, body, brain, and spirit). We talked about, where they felt the strongest that week – Did they do good on a test and feel strong in the brain? Did they make new friends and feel great in the social part?
Girls half my age were telling me how silly it was to compare yourself to a girl on the cover of a magazine because they are airbrushed and how beautiful I was. Let me tell you, that was a breathe of fresh air. I want those girls to be the next leaders of our nation.
Don’t rely on other people to validate you. A boyfriend, friend, even family. They can tell you that you are beautiful over and over again but if you cling to your insecurities it won’t change a thing. Even me telling you how much worth you have will not change anything. But you are. There is a God who created you, and is so in love with you.
“I hope you know you’re capable and brave and significant. Even when it feels like you’re not.”
Let’s be warriors for the next generation of women. Let’s teach them that comparison IS the thief of joy.